


Insult to Injury

by Corde_And_Dorme



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Attachments, Baby Obi-Wan learning, Basically what happens when Palpatine decides to raise Obi-Wan as his own, Dark Obi-Wan Kenobi, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Sith Tattoos, Force Visions, I have no clue where this will go, Manipulative Sheev Palpatine, More characters to be added, More tags to be added, Obi-Wan The Negotiator, Obi-Wan raised by Sheev Palpatine, POV Obi-Wan Kenobi, Palpatine being Palpatine, Qui-Gon Jinn Needs a Hug, Sith Code, Sith Obi-Wan Kenobi, Sith Training, The Future isn't set in stone, but it sure ain't that, maybe? - Freeform, we'll get there when we get there
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-19
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:35:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21863848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Corde_And_Dorme/pseuds/Corde_And_Dorme
Summary: “The first casualty of war is Innocence.”Palpatine finds Obi-Wan before he makes it to the Temple.[Or the one where Obi-Wan is raised as an attachment loving Sith and Qui-Gon Jinn and Anakin Skywalker didn't stand a chance.]
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Sheev Palpatine, Qui-Gon Jinn & Obi-Wan Kenobi
Comments: 44
Kudos: 358
Collections: Sith Tattoos





	1. Early Birds gets the Worm

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Faeymouse](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Faeymouse/gifts).



> Cool cool cool, so I was SUPPOSED to be working on my really long Obi-Wan and Anakin leaving the Order story but - well - we can't have all the nice things? Right? Right. So. Blame Faeymouse. We made a deal. A DEAL. I post this story and Pulsion gets finished.  
> You're welcome.  
> (It also works for me, cause Sith Tattoos are basically the reason for this being finished)  
> (p.s. tags will come as the chapters. Cause, I don't know.)

The child’s anger was as potent to Sidious as the bouquet someone had shoved into his face. Ensnaring as it was, the anger is not what caught his attention. It was lovely and powerful, and it was uncommon but not rare. That wasn’t what caught his attention. No. What caught his attention was that the thread the anger was coming from was pale, pale green, nearly white, and translucent. Pale, or the lighter hues, meant youth. It signified a lack of experience or lack of choices to make. But green meant Force sensitive. This green leaned closer to emerald, too, or it would - in time.

The youth was strong in the Force and in anger and Palpatine was always interested in such a beast.

The only problem was... he was very, very close to the Temple. 

He was halfway across the plaza before he caught sight of the direction of the thread. It pulsed, faint, as if calling to him, and he kept a steady, slow pace towards the youth. Crowed, bodies pressing in from all sides, but the masses tended to notice when someone ran or walked fast. A slow, easy, steady walk was ideal.

But the thread was going in the direction of the Temple. If there was one thing the Jedi would do to a young child, strong in the Force and angry - it was to placate them. That would not do. Palpatine hadn’t felt this much potential in months. Years even. Not since Plagueis had begun to search for a woman to house his ‘experiment’. Well. Women. Plural. It wouldn’t do to put all their eggs in one basket.

He caught up with the pulsating, flaring green thread with only a mile to spare between them and the temple.

Sidious allowed a satisfied smirk to exist for a moment as he found his prey.

They were a human man and women, a couple. Both with sandy blond hair, red tinted, walking in the direction of the temple. In the woman’s arms was a toddler, no older than three, who took more after her than his father. Said toddler was pissed. Well. As pissed as any toddler could be. And it was clear why.

“No,” The toddler said, puffy red eyes and tears are going strong. “No! No, no!”

The kid didn’t want to go, and sice he was Force Sensitive that meant to the Temple.

Well. Looks like the kid was going to get his wish, hm?

Putting on his polite but blank face, giving off an aura of patient, calm, and ‘Jedi’. Sidious gave way to Palpatine. Hiding power behind shields, behind a calm politicians smile. He walked up behind them, touching the man on his elbow and said, “Excuse me?”

The man jolted from his touch, twirling, and bring the woman’s focus with him.

“Yes?”

Allowing a little warmth into his voice, he said. “I couldn’t help but notice your son is strong in the Force, would you happen to be going to the Temple?”

Palpatine saw the moment the man ‘made him’ as a Jedi. Relaxed, a grateful smile jumping to his face, as if the world was again making sense. Relief was palpable. “Yes,” 

“He’s been tested, then?”

The man nodded.

“We had Ben tested a month ago. It’s a great honor.”

A great honor, yes, it would be, if he was a Jedi. But he wasn’t. 

Palpatine was more interested in his name.

Ben. Sounded Trader. Plebian. That would change. He would change it. The kid wouldn’t need ties to his old life, not even a name. A name was important after all, and a child such as this deserved the best.

Pushing a Force-Suggestion in his voice, he asked, “What was his count?”

It was something that was impolite to ask. The Jedi would have already informed the parents of that, but he didn’t care. Pushing his luck was easy.. If it worked, with even a touch of the Force, then having them hand over their child would be childsplay. As easy as taking him from the woman’s arms.

The man blinked with a smile, hazy. “They did not give a number, but they said it was ‘notably high’.”

Palpatine’s eyebrow rose on his face. It was the truth. The suggestion had worked, as expected, but the answer unexpected. Notably high? The Jedi were rarely secretive about power level. Especially, not with parents that **want** to part with their children. The woman also smiled.

Ben scowled at the adults. A child. Still, a danger.

Sidious kept his mask firm.

“Well, I can take him from here.” The force-Suggestion stronger this time, overpowering the two parents. He held out his arms to Ben, who was still upset and clinging to his mother. The child eyeing him with distrust and curiosity.

Palpatine knew he would need to get used to a child’s mind-set. Much more willing to follow his Thread into certain trouble. Curious rather than smart, child-like rather than adult. It was honest, too, which would be a refreshing change, but one that Palpatine would make sure to teach-out of him at the first opportunity.

“I don’ wanna go,” Young Ben said, looking to Palpatine’s outstretched arms with trepidation and fear. But his mother deposited him and before he could cry, Palpatine was comforting him. Using the Force to cover him with a sense of peace, and finality, and if he was a little heavy on the dark - too - then he was. Ben stopped sniffling immediately, enraptured by the easy use of the Force.

“Don’t worry, Young One, you’ll like it with me,” Palpatine smiled. No suggestion, facts. “You know why your parents have chosen to give you away, correct?”

The woman frowned at his wording. Palaptine didn't care. He was working on weaving together a Force-Compulsion for her to forget all about this. All she would remember is giving her child to the Jedi, the peace she would feel, and the compulsion for another child strong in her gut. Childsplay.

Ben wasn’t oblivious to the atmosphere. Young as he was. He nodded and answered Palpatine’s question. “I do stuff.” He shifted. “Sometimes, stuff break. I don’t got... I don’t got control.”

He was a parrot, saying what he had heard.

“You will be taught to control,” Palpatine assured him. Turning back to the parents, his construct in the force weaving together before his eyes. “He is in good hands.”

The woman smiled, beamed more like, and leaned forward to run a hand down Ben’s downy soft hair. The man stayed back, keeping himself away, keeping his emotions away. He’d already decided to give the child to the Jedi, and that hurt, Palpatine could tell, and so he wanted to acknowledge that hurt as little as possible. 

So easy.

“Be good,” His mother told Ben, pressing her forehead to his. “Be strong. You’ll make a fine Jedi one day.”

_Not if I have anything to say about it._

Sidious smiled, holding his newest charge in his arms, and closed the threads around their heads. As one, they blinked, like dumb Banthas and turned without another word, walking away. That distressed Ben, but only for a few minutes, as Sidious lead him away, far, far away from the temple he should have gone to.

\------

The first snag came in the form of this:

Sidious wasn’t exactly sure how to take care of a child. 

He himself didn’t have any memories, good or bad from when he was a toddler - but he was a Dark Lord of the Sith. How hard could it be? If he could put together a 30 year foolproof plan to get himself an Empire, he could take care of a child.

It took him a week to realize he’d made a mistake.

Which is honestly six days longer than it should have been, but he is stubborn and not pushed or swayed. He learns not everything is a challenge he should face, but delegated correctly. It’s a lesson he learns well. When he is ready, an apprentice he shall take, but until such a time he will leave the child-rearing to someone else.

Not that he took a completely active role. No. He left the caring, the minding, the babying to his minions. The ones who knew him, who worshiped him, who were loyal to him. It's not that. This was the first attempt he had gone through to have an active role in the child's life. Maul was certainly not Ben material. They both required different stimuli to flourish.

Pain for Maul, he should think, and, he nearly cackled, love for Ben.

Going from 0-100 was not the best of plans, he acknowledged. It was just... the kids life-force was so engaging. So young and so full of potential, Sidious could have watched him for hours.

But potential was potential, not natural born talent. Potential was future worth. Future plans to bank on. And he had no need of an heir, this very second. 

It took him a week, to cement his plan for the little tyke. Took him a week of watching his pulsing, throbbing, thrumming life-thread and decide how best to go about having him raised. A week of immersing himself in the future possibilities. Studying and planning the best way to garner not only loyalty but a willingness for knowledge, the force, and power. 

It was a no brainer. 

It was a challenge.

Because Palpatine knew how to ensnare loyalty. He was a Master of it. Through lust of power or ensnaring willingness through fear, or even how to destroy a man and then build him back up. This though. This was going to be an honestly delight to try this new way. Through love. Through attachments that Jedi held so fearfully away from their own chests. Through adoration. Through willingness not for the sake of power or revenge or fear, but through love and family and connection. 

Ben would love him. Ben would obey him. Ben would be a force the world would not even know to fear.

The Jedi would never see this Sith coming.

After all, Sith were evil. How could one turn from love?

So. Sidious gives Ben to one of his most loyal servants, one of his older Hands. Lays out a five year plan to revisited each year based on progress. Renames Ben, which takes a pondering to find a name to fit that isn’t Sith, but isn't Jedi either, and decides on Obi-Wan Kenobi. Then he sends his Hand to Naboo, with the young Obi-Wan in tow. 

Promises the youngling that he will visit as often as time allows when the little one, who has grown attached, cries.

All is right.

\------

Sidious visits when time permits, but often receives status reports. All good. Obi-Wan is a bright child, and Sum-Vira has no complaints of the boy as she grows more and more fond. Precocious, tenacious, smart as a whip. As the child learns to read and write, to think critically, and to understand the world Palaptine decides to take an active approach once more.

The Force can teach itself, but not the way Palpatine wants.

Sitting with Obi-Wan when he is five years old, both of them folded into meditative poses, Palpatine watches. Obi-Wan falls into meditation easily for an active child, and Palpatine is once more vicious satisfied to know he stole this from the Jedi. The boy would have made a perfect one. Loyalty and obedient, and all in. Except, he grows attached easily, already has. The Jedi would have taught that out of him, but Sidious finds no need.

“Is this all we are doing?” Obi-Wan asks, peaking through his fringe. 

“No.” Palpatine answers simply, which prompts the boy to open his right eye.

“Then what are we doing?”

Excitement suffused the Force around them. Palpatine had long forgotten what it was like to be around someone who was so unshielded. 

It would come in time. Sum-Vira would make sure of that.

“We’re beginning your lessons in the Force.”

This time, there is no hiding Obi-Wan’s outward excitement as both eyes pop open and he comes crawling forward, so he is closer. Landing on his knees, feet and ankles tucked beneath his butt, he is the perfect picture of listening.

“What are we going to do first?”

Palpatine smiles.

“This.” And he summons the darkness into the room. Only a very small amount. An amount that Obi-Wan had already been exposed too by virtue of living in this house. Still, all children are mostly light-bound, and Obi-Wan wiggles uncomfortably, frowning.

“I don’t like that,” 

Palaptine just summons more. “Hm? Really? Can you tell me why?”

Obi-Wan’s face pinched, but he was thoughtfully quiet as he tried to understand why. 

“Feels icky.”

“Like cold water dripping down your back?” 

Obi-Wan nodded firmly.

“That is natural,” Palpatine assured him. “Do not fear. This is the Dark Side of the Force. It is not evil, it is merely used for it’s own purposes. It has it’s own will. It’s own life.”

Still looking uncomfortable, Obi-Wan nodded. “But why use it?”

“Because it is strong, not like the natural or Unifying Force.”

All Jedi gobbledygook, but it would help Obi-Wan to learn about the world. And what a wide world it is.

“Hold out your hand.”

Obi-Wan did so. Promptly jumping backward as Palpatine placed a finger on his palm and allowed a little of his own darkness, his own corruption come out to play, the small lightening shock startling Obi-Wan.

“Ouch!” Obi-Wan sobbed, flinchingly, aware that his tears were not welcome. “That hurt! Why did it hurt?”

“Come here,” Palptainte opened his arms and the young trusting Obi-Wan flew into his grasp. “Oh, Young One,” 

Sidious sighed, cupping Obi-Wan’s cheek gently, comforting, completely at odds with his personality. 

“The dark is greedy. It takes and it takes, but it also gives and it gives. It is best you get used to both sides of the Force, lest you forget the dangers of them both.”

“I didn’t like it...” Obi-Wan sniffled, burying his head into Palpatine’s robes. “I don’t want to be darkened.”

“Nobody comes out of life undarkened, Obi-Wan,” Palaptine scolded him in the lightest way he could. “You shall be darkened just like I and Sum-Vira. It is the way of the world. We’re just giving you a head start.”

Obi-Wan says nothing, quiet and contemplative both.

Sidous takes that as a win.

\------

The next few years Obi-Wan flourishes under Sum-Vira’s tutelage and Palpatine’s advisement.

The spring sees Darth Plagueis dead. Killed in his bed, torn apart by his own beasts, with Palpatine burning the place down behind him as he left. His only regret being that he didn’t track where his master’s experiments were housed. The self destruct timer was perfectly set for when his heart stopped beating. The old Munn was impressively foreshadowed of many things, even his death. Damn bastard.

Wiley and old, his Master had known he would be betrayed soon.

Rule of two decrees it, for he had Maul, and Palpatine obeyed.

 _For now,_ he thinks of Obi-Wan and Maul and the Jedi he speaks to of dark secrets. _For now._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starting with baby-Obi-Wan I know, I know, we want ACTION, but I can't. I have to write like 20K+ stories or it ain't NOTHING. So backstory it is ;)  
> So buckle in babes, we're bout to be here for a lonnngggg time.


	2. So it begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obi-Wan learns. It goes about how expected.

The first time Obi-Wan  really  hears of the Jedi, it’s from one of his classmates.

“Yeah,” The boy, Areld, said to another of his classmates, his face serious. “My baby brother  just  got tested. He passed!”

Obi-Wan hadn’t been listening until he heard the magic words: Tested. There was a test? Had he had it? Would he be good at it? Perking up, ears turned, intrigued as he swiveled to listen better. Obi-Wan opened himself to the Force. Trying to discern what all they were talking about meant.

He liked tests. He liked proving himself.

“Wow,” Imela to his right said. “The Jedi were there? At your house?”

Areld puffed up.

“Yup! The Jedi took ‘em, too. It’s a great blessing to have a Jedi in the family.”

He says it like its known, like its a repeated recording of his parents. An echo. Obi-Wan can only cock his head to the side and wonder what kind of honor there is in giving away your child. He knows he  was given  away. Left to fend for himself. And if Lord Palpatine hadn’t saved him, he might have died. Every day he is thankful.

His Lord had never explained  fully  why,  perhaps  if he asked his Guardian, Sum-Vira, she would tell him.

Obi-Wan knows to keep his questions to himself. He is special, after all. Asking questions can be bothersome for his teachers, especially ones like these. He will ask his Sum-Vira when he gets home. She will know what a Jedi is, and testing, and why it’s an honor.

\------

“Ahh,” Sum-Vira said, with a smile that would have put a supernova to shame. “I see you’ve finally learned of the Jedi way.”

Though her smile was kind, her eyes were not. That was something that Obi-Wan had learned at a young age. Adults always had a mask. Adults lied. They traded lies like credits. Like bartering. It was up to him and others to see through that mask. If one could not, they would not survive long in the world. Obi-Wan knew this like breathing.

Obi-Wan was still young enough that his own mask wasn’t anything special, ditzy and innocent.

“Do they  really  take children from their families?” Obi-Wan asked, trying to remain calm, but he failed. He still remembered, after all. In fuzzy recollection he could never forget, two humans walking away from him. His mother. His father. Abandoning him into the arms of Lord Palpatine. A complete and utter stranger. Why, Palpatine had never said, but he had always looked  terribly  sad when he mentioned it. Obi-Wan never pressed, knowing he would tell when he was ready for Obi-Wan to know.

“They do, child.” This time her face softening away from the rage that simmered under the surface. “They take, and they take, and they think nothing of it. The Jedi call themselves peace-keepers. Guardians of the Galaxy. They are nothing more than the Republic’s attack-dogs.”

Obi-Wan shivered. Such duplicity. Obi-Wan felt anger on behalf of everyone who was so blind. He felt proud that he was part of the people who knew right.

“Would they have taken me, even if my parents hadn’t abandoned me?”

“Darling,” Her hands reached out to cup his face  gently  within her withered hands, pushing back his fringe . “What do you think Lord Palpatine saved you from?”

Ice-cold water ran down Obi-Wan’s spine. “But, he told me - I remember -“

“Shhh,” His guardian hushed him, with a bright smile, not hiding anything beneath it. “Lord Palpatine knew this day would come. The day you questioned. I can explain all, if you so wish, Obi-Wan, or...” She paused and Obi-Wan knew what she was going to say. “We could call our Lord?”

“Can we?” Obi-Wan asked, eyes wide. Calling his lord  was reserved  for weekly status reports on his health, his grades, and his life. Not due for another three cycles.

Sum-Vira’s voice was dry as she chuckled.

“I have already told you we could.”

This was a rare chance.

“Then yes,” Obi-Wan nodded as  furiously  as he could. “Please, I would like to know.”

\------

“My lord,” They both greeted as Palpatine showed up in his senatorial robes on holo.

“Sum-Vira, Obi-Wan!” He exclaimed, true warmth in his eyes. “What can I do for you both?”

“Obi-Wan has a question for you, Master,” Sum-Vira said, pushing Obi-Wan forward. Away from his shy hiding.

“Oh?”

Taking a deep breath, the boy looked up into the eyes of his savior. “The Jedi  were mentioned  today in class, my lord. One of my classmates brother’s was taken... Sum-Vira said that would have been my fate had you not saved me...”

“You have questions.”

“Yes, my Lord.” Obi-wan answered in the affirmative. “I... did you stop my parents from giving me to the Jedi?”

Palpatine didn’t even hesitate. “I did.”

Obi-Wan sighed. His worst fears coming true. Not only had his parents  just  given him away, they hadn’t even done their duty right. At least by the rest of the Galaxy.

“... Why?”

The holo was oh so blue, and a little fuzzy, but when Palpatine chuckled in fond amusement, it was enough to settle Obi-Wan  . Enough to see the crinkle on the edge of his eyes. Enough to listen to the sound and smile  shyly  back.

“Oh, my young one. I saved you because it was the right thing to do. It is  not often , after all, I am handed the opportunity to save a life from slavery.”

“Slavery?” Obi-Wan gasped, feeling  suddenly  ill. He knew what slavery was. The worst of the worst. To bend someone to your will.

Palpatine nodded, serious. “What else would you call what they do?  Parents offer their children up like sacrifices, to  be used by  the whole of the Galaxy without mercy or forgiveness  . And not all  are chosen  to be Jedi, either. Force-Sensitive are all but kidnapped at birth, and forced into this farce of a religion. It’s slavery, plain and simple.”

Slavery. Obi-Wan felt faint.

But, that’s what it was, wasn’t it? It all clicked. Everything made sense in a horrible, horrible way. Everyone always talked about Jedi like they were the best thing ever. How could they?

“Does nobody else see this?”

Palpatine sighed.

“Unfortunately, most people are  just  glad to have a place for Force-Sensitives to go, to belong. They don’t look past the surface issues.”

“Is there anything we can do?” Obi-Wan asked, eyes blazing in righteous, childish fury. “It’s not right! To  be taken  from family, to  be given  away by family! All to  be forced  to serve the Jedi.”

“Unfortunately, Obi-Wan, there is nothing we can do. It’s tradition at this point. It’s all people know.”

Obi-Wan blazed with fury. How dare anyone think a sentient being should  be raised  for such a thing? There was free-will for a reason! And that they didn't even realize it was slavery... that was the worst part.

Palpatine had a very small bond with the child, and  therefore  felt everything he did.

And as Obi-Wan’s eyes glowed, only for a second, the brightest shade of burning gold, Sidious rejoiced.

Once Obi-Wan calmed himself, they talked for another two hours about the republic and the Jedi.  The longer they talked, the more Obi-Wan became convinced he had to free his force-sensitive brothers and sisters from such a wicked, tyrannical hold . Especially the one’s who had not been born yet.

Nobody was even going to face what he had.

\------

From that day on, Obi-Wan changed. He didn’t withdraw from children his own age, didn’t pull back from his friends, but his focused switched. Obi-wan was never a quiet child, but he did begin to read.  Voraciously  . He read everything he could get his hands on. Politics. Geography of the Galaxy.  A number of  different languages. He learned the laws of Naboo within two months. Was able to speak the native Naboo language in four months (  fluently  , before he was passable).  In a year, he had the framework of the republic mapped out into weak Seats of the Senate, into Jedi sympathies, and on how well the Republic actually worked .

Obi-Wan, young as he was, innocent as he was, hopeful and full of faith as he was,  was astounded  to find that more often than not the Republic failed in keeping the peace  . For all it boasted. More worlds joined every decade. Less worlds produced  abundantly  . (Entropy is the word, but he won’t learn that for another year at Sum-Vira’s knee.) The republic  is bloated , fat, and dying.

Any fool can see it.

He’s nine when he understands, that peace is a lie. The republic boast of it often enough, but it is a lie as  surely  as the Jedi are. There is no absolute peace. It’s an impossibility. Everyone is at war with something, or someone.

He’s nine and ten days when he realizes that his passionate speeches to his classmates are getting somewhere  . That words are his strength, and he can wind them up as often as he can depress them. He learns that he can set the mood with a few words spoken  peacefully , or in anger, or in boast. (Obi-Wan never boasts. It’s beneath him).

He’s nine and two months when he makes his first big break. When he wins over a student to his way of thinking.  When he argues so  successfully  that half their class have propositioned the teacher to begin a petition to vet who the Jedi  are allowed  to interview .

(The first one to sign the petition is Areld - his face stony as he thinks of his brother)

It’s the first time his words, his strength, has born fruit.

It’s sweet. Its heedy.

It’s victory.

When he tells Palpatine this, when he is nine and five months, his Lord beams at him. It’s the most beautiful expression Obi-wan has ever seen, because this is his Lord, and his Lord  is pleased  with him. He is smiling so  warmly  at him; Obi-Wan thinks he might burst into flames.

“Do you know, Obi-Wan,” Palpatine says with so much pride, so much joy, that Obi-Wan can't help but focus completely on him. “You’ve  just  realize what the Jedi will never embrace.”

That catches his attention. If nothing else, dislike of the Jedi  is shared  so  strongly  in their household. “Oh?”

“Yes. It’s called a Code. The Jedi have one. And so do... many other Force user in the galaxy.”

Obi-Wan  is astonished  he didn’t know. With wide-eyes he begs, pleads, to  be told  this Code. Not the Jedi one, thank you very much, but the other.

Palpatine obliged.

“Peace is a lie, there is only passion.

Through passion, I gain strength.

Through strength, I gain power.

Through power, I gain victory.

Through victory, my chains  are broken .

The Force  shall  free me.”

Palpatine speaks, the words flow, and Obi-Wan holds his breath. It... resonates. Like a heartbeat. Like a promise. Like a hug. The Force sings around him, but... its joy  is tempered by  his astonishment. So right, he feels, in that moment, that he wants to tell the world. Only, he’s learned, as only experience can teach, that some things aren’t for everyone to know.

And this. This isn’t a secret. It’s a truth. But it’s a truth that’s a hard pill for some to swallow. Obi-Wan knows this as soon as Palpatine finishes speaking. Obi-Wan knows that this Code, this piece of history, this truth; it had to  be protected .

Obi-Wan wants to thank him so  profusely  , wants to do something, but he can’t find the words, or an action, that could ever repay Palpatine for all he has done . Instead all he can do is speak the words, knowing they are so paltry.

“I don’t know how to thank you, my Lord.”

Obi-Wan falls to his knees.  Sum-Vira has long since stopped attending these meetings, but he almost wished for her support . “You’ve done so much for me, Lord Palpatine... I don’t know how I will ever be able to pay my debts to you.”

In holos, it's hard to make out emotion. Obi-Wan does so only because of a fledgling bond between him and Palpatine. He doesn’t know this, of course, he  just  assumes the Force has its hands in this, too. So when he feels a pleased, purring kind of warmth - he knows Palpatine  is pleased  with his deference.

“Oh, Obi-Wan,” Palpatine says, unfolding his hands. “You are young. I wish only for you to grow stronger, more powerful, more intelligent. I only want the best for you. I saved you because you deserved to  be saved  . Debts will  be payed  when debts  are payed .”

And Obi-Wan promises then and there he will make Palpatine proud of him. Every day, every single day.  With a single-minded focus, he promises he will be everything Palpatine wants from him and more .

“Of course,” He says, and knows it's not enough.

It’s never enough.

\------

Four months. Nothing changes. Until one day. Until one day, the bond that Obi-Wan shared with Sum-Vira  was shattered . Her death felt only by him and Palpatine. Her death stabbing Obi-Wan like a nail through the heart. The Force falls silent around him as his world implodes.

It’s not the first time he’s been in pain, but it’s the first time he understand why someone would commit suicide.

He’s filled with pain. With anger. As soon as the bond  is severed  , as soon as his world turns upside down, things grow - colder . All warmth leaving. And for all his anger, his fury, he’s never felt this cold.  So he does what any panicking Force-Sensitive that has never  been trained by  Jedi does: He takes all his emotions, pushes them into his chest, tries to smother them, and allows pure fire to take him . It’s miles ahead of the cold in his chest, the warmth from his rage gets his blood boiling, but Obi-Wan doesn’t care. At least he can feel something.

It's the first time he fed that growing hole in his chest.

It is not the last.

Miles away, Palpatine experiences the mild discomfort of one of his bonds breaking and another of his bonds saturated in Darkness; he smiles .

\------

Senator Palpatine shocks the world by adopting a  newly  orphaned boy, Obi-Wan Kenobi when his guardian dies  suddenly,unexpectedly, off-world .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Qui-Gon Jinn enters the picture!


	3. Could have, should have, can't

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Nubian's want Obi-Wan tested. They comply.  
> Qui-Gon Jinn did not expect this from a simple midichlorian testing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Annndddd last chapter for today. ;) I just needed to get Qui-Gon Jinn in here before the day was out, so you can kind of understand SOME of the direction this story is going to take!

Adopting Obi-Wan was as easy as declaring it publicly. Then signing on a couple dozen lines of filiplat. Even though he had all but taken the child in infancy, the rest of the world didn’t know that. Sum-Vira had taken care of him, had raised him, and nobody else knew of his visits twice a year to Obi-Wan. No. They thought he had just found this orphaned ten year old and decided to take him under his wing. 

It was all anyone could talk about for _weeks_. Sum-Vira couldn’t have died at a better time. It was election season, after all. The polls ate up the whole situation. 

He rose five points in a few days time!

The most shocking thing, was when the Jedi came, asking to test the child. Palpatine had years with Obi-Wan, who was ten now and way too old to train. It’s ridiculous that they would come to test a child this old, but it seems a Senator had requested it. Sidious seethed underneath the doddering old-man facade he has perfected. But this Master Jinn who comes, with bright blue eyes that see to much, forces his hand. (Not like he could have said no, anyway, he’s a Sith, not politically-suicidal, if one of his rivals thinks this will do anything, he’s wrong).

Obi-Wan had perfected his mask, perfected serenity, that he only echoed what a Force-Sensitive his age would. Palpatine had trained that into him since he was five. Old enough to know he could feel the force, and yet young enough that he hadn’t understood the limitations. It had been amazing to watch what a young force-Sensitive could do when they didn’t know the word **no** and only wanted to please him. 

Sum-Viras had continued the training well. 

He would miss her and her talent. She was a good Hand. 

“Hello Obi-Wan,” Master Jinn greeted his ward. “I am sorry for your loss.”

Blank eyed, Obi-Wan gave them a single nod, showing he heard, but did nothing more than stood, hands behind his back, eyes averted. At eight years old, Obi-wan had already masked shielding this Master struggled with. He learned it as a game, and had kept it up to impress Palpatine. Sidious was properly impressed and had even come to visit. As a child, he’d been full of the energy of a star. 

At ten, Obi-Wan is even more impressive. Mind talents, this one has in spades. Already a better investment than Maul.

Obi-wan shows none of that spirit in front of these Jedi. 

“Do you know why we are here?” Master Jinn asked. 

Obi-Wan’s speech is concise, not a word wasted. “To test me.”

Trying to sooth the oddly blank, probably shell-shocked boy in front of him, Master Jinn knelt down.

That garnered a reaction. Eyes widening, as if Jinn were about to attack. Obi-Wan didn’t move, though. Beside fidgeting. He couldn’t stop that. He _was_ nervous. He allowed that to surround him. Saturate the force. It made sense that a ten year old would feel nervous, right?

“Do you believe we have a reason to?” The Master asked as Obi-Wan looked him over, trying not to show how suspicious he was. And he was very suspicious.

“Yes.”

“Oh?” Jinn smiles, as disarming as he can. 

Obi-Wan is surprised to believe him. Though he senses sadness, grief, anger in him. Such conflicting things. The young boy wonders if Master Jinn, with his fancy title, and his kind eyes, and his powerful force-signature understands that he is a slave. He knows to ask that would be a social-faux-pas, but it doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to know.

“I am Force-Sensitive,” Obi-Wan confirms. He sees no reason to deny it. They are here to test him, after all. “Though I do not see why it matters to the Jedi.”

“Do you know why you were never tested as a child?” Master Jinn is now all concerned in the force. Truly believing that it is too bad, so sad, disappointing that he was never raised a Jedi.

Obi-Wan sticks to easy, simple, quick answers.

“No.”

“Alright,” Master Jinn hold out his hand. “Can I see your hand, please?”

Obi-Wan gives his right hand and his fingers to be pricked. Though blood is drawn, Master Jinn is calm, soothing in the Force, and it's clear he's done this often. The small machine putters away with his blood being stripped of everything but the necessary information. It won’t take more than five minutes, the Jedi assure them.

The Jedi seem... nervous around him. Obi-Wan doesn’t like the oily-feeling of that emotion. He pulls back, away from them, to stand closer to Palpatine, who allows one hand to rest on his shoulder, smooth down his shoulder blades, giving comfort. Obi-Wan accepts it, giving him a quick, thankful smile.

When the machine is done, the Jedi all gather around and murmur together. Both Palpatine and Obi-Wan are hit with stunned incredulity that the Jedi can’t seem to muffle. Even Palpatine is frowning by the time Master Jinn has turned back to them.

“We apologise for that,” He says, and his smile is frayed, and weak, and Obi-Wan knows something has gone wrong. Narrowing his eyes, he allows the Force to speak to him. It doesn’t matter though, Master Jinn finishes what he was going to say.

“You’ve passed the test. With flying colors,” It's clear to Obi-Wan now why he’s nervous and sad. They didn’t get another Slave when they should have. “You should have been brought to the Temple when you were a child.”

And Obi-Wan feels the truth in those words. Immediately dismisses them. What is a slaves words against their own Master anyway? Of course he _should_ have been brought to the Temple, but he **wasn’t**. That was not his life. Could haves were not reality.

Obi-wan knows this better than most.

“Alas, you are just about too old to train,” Qui-Gon told him, apologetically. “We could petition the Counsel, but I do not have faith they would see the potential in you that I see.”

Obi-wan frowns, but nods. “I am fine where I am... I don’t need to be a Jedi.”

Qui-Gon relaxes, marginally, as he lays a hand on Obi-wans shoulder.

“I am glad we have not ruined your night, then, with false promises. We came only to assuage the community at large.”

Obi-wan is not quite sure what that means, but he nods, and smiles at Qui-Gon.

When Master Jinn turns to leave, when he turns his back, Obi-Wan feels, for a single moment, as if he’d missed his transport. A misstep in the Force. In a single moment he watches something play out before his eyes. It’s... like a holovid, but it's just him, and the world turns into nothing more than a memory.

_In front of him is Master Jinn and an older Obi-Wan. Perhaps at age fifteen. He knows it’s him. He owns a mirror, afterall. Except this boy is smiling, a bright, big grin as he and Master Jinn play with training blades. They spar, no rhythm to their movements. Well, none Obi-Wan can find. And he knows the basics of form I, II, and III. Both are happy. The happiness is singing in the force. They belong in a way Obi-Wan never knew one could belong._

The picture twists, spinning, and suddenly --

_It’s the two of them again. Obi-Wan is wearing a slave-collar. Master Jinn is trying to get it off. The entire exchange is tense. Filled with regrets, with anger, with a resigned air of death. Obi-Wan can only watch as they both argue, their words nonsense, because their words have never happened, will never happen. Master Jinn listens to something the Other Obi-Wan says and... and Obi-Wan had never seen someone look gutted. As if air had been punched straight through his lungs. As if the world had stopped spinning. It’s emotionally charged. Master Jinn hugs the boy to his chest, and - Obi-Wan blinks - are there tears in his eyes?_

_\-- What is this_? Obi-Wan questions as the world spins one more time --

 _In front of Obi-Wan is a thing that feels more like the Force that he is familiar with. It’s cool, it's calm, it's tranquil and_ **_angry_ ** _\- it's a balm to his heart. It’s familiar. The face of the red and black person-shaped thing - a Zabrak maybe? - is wielding a red lightsaber the color of liquid ruby._

_Obi-Wan knows this anger, this feeling of grief and rage, and he embraces it. Which is of course, when he turns around to see what the red-and-black man is facing. His heart catches in his throat as he is faced with himself. Head shaved near bald, a twirl of hair hanging off his head. A braid. A Padawan braid. A Slavery-training weapon as near as a lightsaber but all mental. But that is not what catches his attention._

_This Obi-Wan is older, is facing the red-and-black-man, blue lightsaber held high and haughty and_ **angry** . _Obi-Wan catches only a glance of Master Jinn on the ground a few steps behind where his alter-ego holds his lightsaber. It all comes to a head as the Obi-Wan in front of himself jumps, as if at Obi-wan, towards the red-and-black man._

Obi-Wan is back in the room with Palpatine. The Jedi have turned back, now closer. Practically on top of him. _Why?_ Obi-Wan thought fuzzily. The floor was closer. Obi-Wan could reach out and run a hand over it. 

_Oh. He had fallen._

“-wan, what did you see?”

The voice was Master Jinn’s. As he looked up, into Master Jinn’s eyes, something sang a sad dying song. Like a bird falling from a tree. Dead. It hurt, in his chest, but Obi-Wan pushed it away. Later, he would embrace it, but for now... For now he reached out a hand until his palm came into contact with Master Jinn’s chest. Master Jinn was a furnace, and Obi-Wan mourned for a second what that vision had meant. 

Baffled, the Force sang to him, that was what Master Jinn was feeling. Confused. Worried.

“You were supposed to be my Master.” Obi-Wan says. Without any preamble, any warning, he's taking his hand back, tucking his legs underneath him, and standing. His duty done. 

He’d delivered the message the Force had asked him to. 

At least. He thought he had. Obi-Wan wasn’t sure as he looked down at Master Jinn.

Master Jinn is still on the floor, kneeling, with a peculiar expression on his face. Torn between disbelief and - _oh_ , Master Jinn had felt it too. When their eyes had met. When a connection sang. When the world had been right. When the Force had told them that the future could be **that**... but it wasn’t. The world was as it was. Obi-wan belonged to the Jedi in the same way Palpatine did. 

He’s on his way back towards Palpatine who was looking at him, worry creasing his brow. 

Master Jinn got to his feet behind him.

“Are you alright?” Palpatine asked, a hand landing on his cheek.

Obi-Wan smiled, but it felt shallow, breakable, fragile. “I saw what the future would have been like had I been delivered to the temple.”

Palpatine froze.

“Oh?”

Obi-Wan frowned, and nodded. “I had a vision... A future that **can’t** happen.”

Not won’t. Can’t.

Palpatine had heard what Obi-Wan had said to Master Jinn, but it hadn’t sank in. _‘You were supposed to be my, Master.’_ When it hit, he felt a gleeful kind of triumph. **_Oh. This was too good._ ** Obi-Wan had been just a convenient chess-piece when Palpatine had found him, so young, so impressionable - but this. This was so much more than he could ever hope for! The Force had just dumped a possible future onto his wards lap. A future of Padawan-dom. A future with a Master that would _love_ him. A future with the Jedi. With probably the only Jedi willing to tell the counsel to fuck off and love the boy.

And instead of trying to follow it through, Obi-Wan had killed it.

Sidious wanted to cackle. 

Oh his _perfect_ Obi-Wan. So obedient. So loyal. 

“I can petition the council about this,” Master Jinn said, hurriedly, from behind them. Obi-Wan stiffened but turned back. “I follow the Force’s will, and if this is the Force’s will - then I would be more than glad to be your Master.”

“The will of the Force?” Obi-Wan asked, uncertain. Palpatine mentally kicked himself for not warning his young apprentice about how the Jedi imagined the Force. That was a lesson for when he was older, more jaded. When he fought Jedi. When he _learned_ how to fight Jedi.

“The Force gave you a vision,” Master Jinn said. “I would be a fool to ignoring it.”

“I’m not ignoring it... but the Force only shows possible future’s, right?” Obi-Wai countered. Jinn nodded. “So then, it’s my choice too, right?”

Master Jinn’s force-signature rose like a wave, before settling. He nodded again.

“Then, I apologise, Master Jinn,” Obi-wan breathed deeply, smiled sadly, as he walked back over to him. “I must decline. I don’t think I want that future to pass.”

The room chilled.

Master Jinn closed his eyes, a moment of pain, a moment of torn hope, torn faith. Still he was tenacious.

“Can I ask why? What you saw?”

Obi-wan bit his lip, looking away before taking a breath and nodding, but the nod was for himself. Nobody else. Steeling himself.

“I saw us training. I had a braid. We were... happy?” Obi-Wan touched the side of his head where it would have been next to his carefully tidied hair. “I saw you... save me? Perhaps, that part wasn’t clear... I saw you...” He took a deep breath, before meeting Master Jinn’s eyes. “I saw you dead.”

There was a choked sound that Master Jinn made in his throat as his eyes widened, his mouth opened a fraction. Then it was gone, hidden under a mask as strong as durasteel. The Force around him created an interesting kind of tunnel, an almost tornado, as the Master took his feelings and released them into the Force. 

So much wasted anger, grief, pain. There was a pang of regret for that waste, but he wouldn’t speak of it.

Obi-Wan knew he had made the right choice.

“I - Thank you,” Master Jinn said. Tucking his arms into his robes. “If that is the will of the Force, then I suppose it is the will of the Force.”

Obi-Wan found himself... amused. This slave, this man who should have been his Master, this **man**. (Just a simple man) He was just so... Obi-Wan found he didn’t have the words. He was amusing, baffling, intriguing, and mysterious. He lived in a world completely different from Obi-Wan. 

He was a Jedi. 

Obi-Wan was... _not_.

For the first time in his entire life, Obi-Wan questioned Palpatine saving him.

It was quickly dashed into non-existence, and he felt ashamed of himself for thinking like that - but it happened. His mind had turned. 

He was allowed a mistake. One.

Bowing, quickly from the waist, Obi-Wan lowered his eyes and told this man, this could-be-almost-had-been-Master, “Thank you, but I think I will trust that the Will of the Force is in us _not_ being a Padawan-Master pair,” Obi-Wan found himself smiling a little too warmly. “Besides, I think I like you alive, better.”

There was an amused choking sound behind Master Jinn who stared at Obi-Wan as if he were the crazy one.

“As you wish,” Master Jinn whispered, bowing back. “If you change your mind, you know where you can find me.”

Obi-Wan was now having fun. Now that the Force had stopped meddling. Or had it just begun? 

“Yes, I do believe I do.”

\------

Palpatine was... conflicted. Once the Jedi had left, Obi-wan had told him in more detail about his Visions. About how if things had gone how the universe had wanted it to, Obi-Wan would be a Padawan Learned to Master Jinn, the very Knight who had come to test him. The Force worked in mysterious ways. 

And then, then Obi-Wan had revealed that it had been Maul, the Apprentice he had picked up from Dathomir who would kill Master Jinn. At least he knew his Apprentice was a good pick. Though he was a holdover until Obi-Wan was old enough.

Or someone more powerful came along.

 _Really_ , Sidious thought to himself, _it was too easy sometimes. So many options._

With how the afternoon had gone, Palpatine found he wanted to simply bask in the Force Threads. Listen to the changes on the wind. Listen to the change of time.

After Obi-Wan’s vision, there was much changing.

\------

The next time the senator went to Coruscant, he requested Master Jinn to be one of the Jedi on Duty. He was informed, sadly, that Qui-Gon Jinn would be off-world on mission. Using a simple Force-Suggestion he learned that once Master Jinn had returned, had debriefed to the council, he had packed up and went to the Outer Rim.

Nobody had been able to contact him since.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Begins Obi-Wan's Fall and Apprenticeship. ;)


	4. Evil is as Evil does

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Young Obi-wan thinks he's ready to learn of Sidious' plots.  
> We'll see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took me some time. I had to get Palpatine's voice down.

The Jedi teach that the Sith are evil, but that’s not true.

Where the Jedi remain impartial, distant, and numb the Sith are focused, directed, with purpose. Where Jedi run cold, the Sith run hot. The Jedi will argue. The Sith will do. The Jedi will tell that the Sith care only for destruction and chaos - that is simply not true. 

Sith care only for themselves. For their goals. For their futures.

Sith care, or else they’d be nothing more than just Force-Sensitive nothings.

Obi-wan learns at the ripe age of eleven that this is what he has been groomed for.

It was a night like any other. 

Naboo was a picturesque planet and the northern hemisphere even more so. The nights were mild, so Obi-Wan and Palpatine were enjoying the night air outside in their sitting porch, as was custom.

Obi-Wan watched Palpatine, knowing he wasn’t being very sneaky about it. The elder man sat with his face basking in the waning sunlight, the waxing sunset. He wasn’t a handsome man by any stretch of the imagination but there was power hidden behind his very essence that Obi-Wan was drawn to. Not just because they were two of the only force sensitives he knew who were not Jedi. 

No. Not just that, but because Obi-Wan loved him. 

When you loved someone or something, Obi-wan had learned at the young age of five, they become nothing less than beautiful. 

“And your studies? How are they?” Palpatine asked, finally turning and confronting him.

“Fine. And the Senate?”

“Still full of brainless half-wits,” Palpatine sighed wistfully. “You can not come of age soon enough. Even just your conversation might be enough to rouse those dole idiots into something resembling intelligent thought.”

Obi-Wan felt his chest puff up at that. Pride and joy suffusing his presence.

That. That was what made him love the man all the more. Each day a little more. Every day all the more.

“You haven’t dropped your shielding once today,” Palpatine praised. “Very good. How are you handling the newest... curriculum?”

Always diplomatic, especially with learning something new and hard, Obi-Wan very carefully didn’t let his distaste over the manner of his learning show. 

“Hiding in the shadows is... hard.”

And it was. Hiding his Force presence was silly, since the Jedi knew of him, but making sure his full potential was never actualized was harder. Unlike Palpatine, he would always be under scrutiny for the tiniest changes in his Force presence. It was made all the harder because his presence had to grow like one of a Feral Force User, and not someone being taught.

Thus, this approach to teaching. 

Making sure all his cloaking was hidden in truth. Small changes were allowable, until he and Palpatine moved to Coruscant and could better hide under the Jedi’s noses. Hiding in plain sight was so much easier when the Jedi weren’t looking.

“It is not meant to be easy,” Palpatine chuckled good naturedly as he patted Obi-Wan’s leg. “It will come in time. You are a bright boy,”

Palpatine knew exactly how to make Obi-Wan flourish.

“Your combat lessons?”

“We’re starting on saber training next week, but for now my shooting scores are within acceptable parameters for my age.”

His guardian nodded at that.

Obi-Wan felt so very small, sometimes, when Palpatine was so very understanding of him. He was within all the parameters for his age, but that never seemed like it was enough. He should be better. He should be the best. All this average was not what he wanted to be, but Palaptine never pushed him farther than he could go.

It was then, in that moment, that Obi-Wan realized he wanted to reciprocate.

Needed to reciprocate.

Palaptine was so good to him. Took him in, taught him, provided for him. Everything. 

“What do you want from me?” Obi-Wan finally asked.

Palpatine gave him one of those knowing smiles he gave out so very rarely.

“Obi-Wan, you are already doing exactly as I expect of you,”

Which isn’t that cryptic. Obi-Wan thinks petulantly.

“Yes, but I want to do more!”

“You do not have to shout, dear,” At Palpatine’s calm and amused face, he backtracks to more a more polite voice. 

“I mean... I know you have plans, I know you have plans for  **me** , but... What can I do? I feel like I am just treading water.”

“You are learning, Obi-Wan. What more do you expect me to ask of you?”

Obi-Wan was young but he wasn’t a fool.

“Anything. Everything.”

Palaptine’s eyes sharpened then and Obi-Wan was given the full weight of the man’s gaze. He met it head on. He had nothing to fear from Palaptine. Palpatine had always wanted the best for him, and Obi-Wan knew no fear of him. 

He almost thinks nothing is going to happen, but it does.

“Do you think you are ready?” Palpatine is serious, deadly serious then. 

Obi-Wan shivers.

“Yes.” Unwavering from his convictions. Even as he thinks, perhaps, he could have waited longer. He could have waited to see that... odd glint in Palpatine's eye. Something possessive and proud and intense.

“Very well.” Then Palpatine rose. “Come.”

Obi-Wan followed obediently 

Palpatine leads them both to the inner-sitting room, his office when the Senate was in session. It had a desk, a massive library, and a variety of comfy seats that Obi-Wan was very accustomed to use for sitting for long hours at a time. This time is different though and Obi-Wan can’t find it in himself to sit. Not even when Palaptine did. The man took a moment, fiddling with the security system, turning it on and arming it, doing something else... too. 

The fuzziness in the Force was overwhelming as Obi-Wan shook his head, trying to get rid of the cobwebs that were sprouting among his brain as the synopsys’ fired.

Then... 

Then Obi-Wan’s world changed.

Palaptine revealed himself by unraveling the shields that cloaked himself and his mind, like ripping away layers of an onion. Slowly at first, and then quickly, until all that was left was the sense that Obi-Wan was absolutely out of his league. 

Darth Sidious reveals himself with glowing, yellow-sick eyes and a force-presence that makes Obi-Wan want to kneel and prostrate himself.

(Which he does.)

Makes the force around him crackle, and writhe, and  **snarl.**

(Which it does.)

Obi-Wan has never felt this level of anger-grief-sadness-rage-fury  **power** . He’s never felt  _ this _ . It’s over before Sidious waves a hand, no, not even that, there is no outward tell - there is just power, overwhelming power that drowns Obi-Wan and then there is  _ nothing _ .

All those shields, all those layers, right back where they started. Palaptine, as if he was a nothing, Obi-Wan knowing he was so far out of his league it wasn’t funny.

Obi-Wan on the ground, holding his breath, not sure how to even start back up again. 

Obi-Wan’s forehead might as well have been melded to the floor as he shook, drunk on the Force of his Lord’s presence. On the Force. On this new aspect of the Force that was greeting him like a new pet. Like a new friend. Like...

Like lifeblood he never knew he needed.

For all his surety, he was still so young and there was no way he could have prepared himself.

“What do I call you?” Obi-Wan asks, because he doesn’t know in this moment what the future holds.

He can’t. 

For how could he ever truly know?

He learns of Sith and Jedi both in his studies. 

The republic loves to talk about both. Sith the boogie-man, and Jedi knights in shining armor. Black and white; as all issues are to children. Obi-Wan knew better. Had been taught better. 

He knew the Jedi.

This man in front of him was not a Jedi. Just as he was not.

“I am called Darth Sidious. High Sith Lord.” The power crackles at the edge of Obi-wan’s vision, but he is pleased, Darth Sidious is pleased at the question. Obi-Wan wants to flinch, but he's frozen. 

“I apologise for hiding myself from you for so long, but you were young... You were not ready. But now,

“Are you, Obi-Wan? Are you ready to  **really** do my bidding?”

It’s a stupid question because Obi-Wan has no strength in him to deny his Lord.

Obi-Wan has never wanted anything more than Palpatine’s approval, his love, and he has poured everything into his Lord. Obi-Wan is loyalty personified. Anything less is blasphemy. He would not be where he was now if not for Palpatine.

If not for Sidious - where would he even be?

Palpatine had always nurtured Obi-Wan’s growth however it came to be. It was only right that he got to harvest from that.

In another Galaxy, in another time, Obi-wan could have been a more selfish person, or a more world worn one. He might have been a Jedi. But here. In this time. He is Obi-wan and he is Sidious’ as surely as the cloak his Lord wears is his.

“I am,” 

Sidious made his way over to Obi-Wan, slid to the floor on his knees with the ease and flexibility of a man much, much younger. He pet Obi-Wan’s hair as the boy breathed deeply, away from his oppressive force-presence that had nearly suffocated him. It was a lot for a first time, and even though Obi-Wan shook, even though he felt like throwing up - Obi-Wan was glad.

“Well, Apprentice?” 

Obi-Wan knew that Palpatine preferred his full, undivided attention, and so, stiffly, with arms shaking, Obi-wan levered himself up onto his elbows, turned his eyes to those yellow-power-filled eyes and spoke.

“Anything and everything, Master. I am yours.”

The hand in his hair tightened, the grip not all that unpleasant, as Sidious craned him further back.

“Good boy,”

There was a pleased, satisfied smirk on his Master’s face. It was different. Sidious and Palpatine were completely different. Obi-wan knew that, he did, but they both were the same person, too. Just like Obi-wan knew eventually he would be split. It was the way of the path he would walk.

Sith and human.

Or Sith and something faking-human.

\------

Palpatine is not cruel to Obi-Wan, not until his Sith training starts. There is no reason to be. Obi-Wan gives him no reason to be. As a child, the Force couldn’t have given him a more perfect vessel.

Abandoned by parents, he grows with a void in his heart and a kind of terror of desertion that Palpatine can not help but adore. He is starved for a love he can never have, so he makes due with what he can touch, what he can have. Which is Palpatine, who as much as he can be there for the boy is still away far too often, aloof, and dispicable at his very heart.

There are cracks in his apprentice that the dark can hide and take up residency in. His attachments are few, for now, but they are strong. His emotions hectic and powerful, and he does not hide them from Palpatine; but he does hide from the world. It creates a dichotomy, like the Sith Lord knew it would, where Obi-Wan is both unashamedly powerful but knowing he is being stifled in the dark. He grows resentful of the world that keeps him trapped. 

Palpatine knows just how to point his apprentice so that none of those feelings come back towards him.

For a seven year investment, Sidious thinks, Obi-Wan was shaping up to be his best.

\------

Obi-wan takes to Sith teaching like a fish to water. He doesn’t have any Jedi-brainwashing to slow him down. He’s only got what Palpatine has put in his head, only what his tutors have trained him in. He’s a blank slate, insomuch as Palpatine could guarantee. Sure, he’s a person and he’s got ideas and plans and goals - but Obi-Wan had been trained foremost to consider Palpatine his savior. The father-figure he wants to please.

Sidious easily slides into place as  _ Master _ . 

At thirteen Obi-Wan is Named. Darth Dolus is born out of the child stolen right from under the nose of the temple, not once, but twice. His name is two-fold, because he is as cunning and sneaky as the blade you slipped between ribs. His Master finds a certain kind of poetic justice in it and Obi-wan knows not to question, but any joy his Master has is shared with him. He can not find fault with it.

Obi-wan can’t help considering the future that could have been had he chosen to go with Master Jinn when he is training. Because, he may take to the training like a fish to water, but it’s  **brutal** . Since he no longer attended any classes anywhere save for his tutors, he was at the mercy of his Master. 

Obi-wan learned early that Sidious wasn’t merciful.

That didn’t mean Obi-wan loved him any less.

The worst training he had had to endure, so far, was being locked in the dark-room for a month and a half, fighting droids intermittently. Food wasn’t guaranteed. Some days he was left alone, other days he was attacked non-stop for hours. He was armed with only one saber, which by the second week he could call back to his hand from any place in the dark room. He learned to sleep when he could, springing awake at any little sound. 

When Sidious came to get him, Obi-Wan was too tired, too overjoyed to question.

“Good job,” Sidious says and that’s enough for Obi-Wan, who needs praise like he needs water.

The proud smile of his Master when he exited the room wearily was worth it.

Once outside of the horrid room it took him a month to get over the jumpiness. It was a month of exhaustion, dehydration, pain, and pushing himself to extremes he knew he would surpass as he aged. 

It isn’t until he is fourteen and Sidious decided to start training his mind (really starts to train his mind) that he learns what real pain is. Physical pain he knew, had embraced, and used to fuel the Darkside at his side like the weapon it was. Mental pain was harder, but he could channel that without much difference. Strength was strength. Power was power.

But then Sidious tears his mind apart, rips through shield-layers like they are paper, and Obi-Wan knows  _ hatred _ . Knows  _ fear _ . Knows  _ pain _ . Sidious is good, and makes sure none of it is associated with his hand, always wears a Jedi face through Mind-Tricks and Illusions. His favorite to use is Master Jinn.

His second favorite to use is Yoda, a small green goblin that Obi-Wan swears he will run through with his lightsaber the moment he is finished constructing it. His Master laughs at that, but doesn’t quell that need - want - just fans the flames of hate and fury. He finds it funny. Finds it... more than pleasing. Obi-Wan wants nothing more than to please Sidious.

In direct parallel, Obi-Wan is learning at Palpatine’s knee how the Senate works, how the Republic works, and how Obi-Wan will fit into the world when he is old enough. He’s being groomed to be both a Sith Lord and Chancellor (though Sidious laughs, because that's not all he’s planning, but Obi-Wan is still young, and his shields are still weak and he would feel horrible if he ruined his Master’s plans, so he stays ignorant).

\------

At fifteen, Obi-Wan begins to truly shadow his Master in the political arena. Politicians who meet Obi-Wan are charmed by him. There are a few sour-grapes, but they don’t necessarily like anyone. It’s in the lap of luxury that Obi-Wan learns how to use people. Because that’s all that politicians do. They use people, they use themselves. Checkerboard and chesspieces and sacrifice and double crosses. It’s all a big, huge game. With people as chips, and planets as collateral. With backstabbing, with secrets that destroy, and with alliances that can be used up on a whim.

Obi-wan learns that Sith  _ love  _ games. For a while he had thought it was just him, but it’s not. 

Why else would Palpatine choose this arena to excel in?

It’s exciting, intriguing. Palpatine likes to pull strings from behind the scenes but Obi-Wan finds that he can find the right words for any situation. He finds he likes to be right in the thick of it. Words are his weapons more than any lightsaber could ever be. He knows he can learn that weapon, has learned the saber, but words... they can build and tear as easily as a knife through silk. They come to him as he watched people in the Force, watches how they interact, how they live, how they  **want** to live, what they want, what they are willing to do, willing to give. 

He finds weakness. He finds strengths.

Palpatine had only tested him once. 

“Choose one,” He says one day, as Obi-Wan is doing his homework at his desk in his office.

There are three pictures on the table in front of him and Obi-Wan silently regards them, before turning a questioning look to Palaptine. Awaiting orders.

“Choose one,” Palpatine repeats with that grandfatherly smile that almost becomes so ingrained in darkness Obi-Wan wants to laugh. “And destroy them.”

Pick, choose, destroy. It was easy. 

His chosen mark was Senator Onaconda Farr. 

“This one, Master,”

One nod. They never speak of it again.

It took Obi-Wan a week. 

Though, really, only a few hours. He had planted the required evidence and then gave a rather frantic anonymous tip. Pictures of kids, no specific gender or race or species. He makes it hard to find, buried in folders upon folders, encrypted upon encryptions. 

Senator Onaconda Farr is arrested exactly a week after Palpatine gives the assignment. It couldn’t have gone better if Obi-wan had planned the arrest. The smile Obi-wan gets afterwards, when it is just him and Sidious, is worth its weight in gold. They never speak of it again, but they both know.

His life is complicated, and split, and hard - but Obi-Wan wouldn’t trade it for anything.

And if he occasionally dwells on Master Jinn and his smile, and how  _ happy _ they had been without any pain or strife in his force vision, in that future - well... nobody could see him, therefore it wasn’t happening. It wasn’t.


End file.
